Day 47 - Flow Breath by Breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel negative when I have commitments later in the day, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I would rather cancel my plans and just mess around listening aimlessly to information like a drug addict instead of physically living equal and one

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attach positive emotions to a ‘free’ and ‘open’ schedule, where I can ‘do what I please’, completely disregarding what is ACTUALLY best for all Life, where it MAY be to fill my calendar completely, it may be to empty my calendar completely, rather the STARTING POINT of who I am with my calendar/relationship to my physical real world doing is what is messed up and I am now writing/righting to correction

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that through my real practical living, pushing myself, showing up day after day, putting myself in the cutting edge of time and relationships, that through these moments and this continual application, WHO I AM is expressing and emerging, as I cannot hide behind my closed eyelids and tune out with headphones, rather it is ME, HERE and NOW acting and supporting and giving as I would like to receive, which is a space and support and community, as COMMUNITY is KEY for the creation of what is best for all Life, it is DAILY CONSISTENT APPLICATION and BUILDING, CATALYZING the spark of Life within each and all of us… 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not clarify my starting point with my schedule and how I stack things into my days, rather I haphazardly put things in the calendar without thinking through physical space-time reality and planning what is actually best, until Here no Further

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it IS best what I am doing with my schedule, that WHO I AM in each moment IS trustworthy and this trust is growing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I can let go of the need for control, and that WHO I AM in the moment as PRINCIPLE will emerge, always and in all ways, and this will be proven breath by breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate responsibility for cleaning out my entire to-do list, which I KNOW is something beneficial for me to do to ‘clear up’ my processing power even more, so I even MORE effectively show up in all that I do, UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my to-do list and Schedule will not be ‘completed’ for years, or maybe forever, BUT it will keep replenishing itself and clearing itself out like the cells of my body, therefore I can love the process, trust the process and PERFECT the process

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that walking the cutting edge of time, filling my calendar, my to-do list and going all out IS actually what is best, as I am truly seeing who I am and what I am made of, as my starting point IS life and doing what is best for all Life, and this is a daily process I walk, breath by breath, in Radical Self-Honesty

When and as I notice myself wanting to clear my schedule, I stop and I breathe

I realize that my main priority is my 20, 6 and 1 for my business

I realize that in my average week I am able to stay consistent with the pillars of my life, making steady progress and growth in all areas, applying the principle of prevention AS my consistent scheduled meetings and my daily checklist

I realize that things ‘hanging over my head’ are the ultimate gift because I see who I am in relation to myself, to others and to time, where Who I AM as the character that is best for all Life will emerge, breath by breath, step by step

I realize that accumulating self-responsibility in every moment is what matters

Therefore

I commit myself to flow through my day, from the starting point of what is best for all Life, f*** my feelings and opinions, just do what is best and step up to GIVE as I'd like to RECEIVE

I commit myself to continually use my schedule and approach my day and activities in full self-honesty

I commit myself to breathe and be Here

I commit myself the starting point of the Character as Who I AM being Best for All Life, ALWAYS, no matter what

I commit myself to radical Self-Honesty

Day 46 - Observe and Rewrite the Character

When I was a kid I was not fully present or aware of what was going on.

Because of this I sucked at baseball practice, because I wasn't present enough to slow down and understand why I wasn't good at batting. Little did I know that this character of not being present, then sucking at baseball, then the following feelings of being timid, being a loser, that THAT character would be embedded within me deep in my subconscious and unconscious, fueling my dread of doing ANYTHING that involved being part of a team, performing, learning, practicing and/or being disciplined.
I realize that I didn’t trust myself because in baseball I struck out and didn’t know how to hit the ball.

I dreaded baseball practice because I would come face to face with the physical reality that I was not effective at hitting the ball. I remember one night I struck out to lose the game. Even before the pitches were thrown I had already accepted I couldn’t get a hit.

Even if I made contact with the ball, I felt defeated and like it was just lucky.

I didn’t understand HOW it worked, with how the swing, my arms, the eye on the ball, ALL connecting with the ball in present time to make a successful hit. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blindly go through Life accumulating characters that were not supportive of Life, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I can rewrite any character through Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to refuse to slow down and ask for support with batting practice

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe it is possible to rush perfection, failing to see/realize/understand that perfection is the process of over and over doing something at the conscious competence level, ALWAYS willing to go back to the basics 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that the real lesson in baseball was me being blatantly aware that the physical will be the real test for if I know something, as I will act DIFFERENTLY and get a DIFFERENT RESULT externally, if my internal change is real, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dread being tested in the physical, failing to see/realize/understand that the test in the physical is the cutting edge and is the best way for me to grow, and is thus a wonderful thing that I now eagerly anticipate while remaining present and Here

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place my self-esteem in a sports game, failing to realize that WHO I AM as LIFE is HERE, where whether I successfully hit a baseball or not is indicative of my worth as Life, where my self-esteem comes into question, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as less than a human because of my failures, not being perfect from day 1, or even year 1, rather I now realize that perfection is the process, it is WHO I AM in the moment of the test, the practice, the writing, the breath, and the directing of myself always and in all ways to do what is best for all Life, THAT is what counts, the Self-Directiveness and the Principled-Living, the results of the successful activity will emerge FROM Who I am in the moment-by-moment living

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that every failure brings the seed of equal greatness, where if I did fail at hitting the ball, I now have a better opportunity of successfully hitting the next ball, IF I was aware…… where now I realize just how little I have been aware through my Life thus far…. Thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be aware in the baseball game, truly observing with responsibility to improve my performance, rather I had just separated myself into my mind and character of the timid loser, where I participate with the world as the shy, timid, loser character, fearful of stepping up and just accepting defeat claiming “I didn’t know any better”, completely abdicating responsibility and Self-Directiveness, UNTIL HERE no FURTHER

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed defeat and no further movement/progress of perfection, without realizing that the defeat can be the input necessary to become the best version of myself. Defeat and losing is GOOD because who I am is Life directing myself and all Life to what is best for all Life, which will include temporary defeats/losses/failures, yet this is part of Anti-Fragile Living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to associate defeat with being of less worth and value, through the images and media I had watched, accepted and allowed, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the participation of emotional energy in the winning or losing of a game, rather than the perfection of the process by which the winning CAN happen

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate the responsibility of understanding probabilities and what is best to do to ensure the highest likelihood of a favorable outcome, like how to best swing the bat, approach the plate, talk to myself, breathe, connect with the ball and observe/take responsibility of my process as a team player where I can learn from anyone/everyone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in backchat, as the shy timid loser morphs into the self-righteous pity partier, completely losing myself as Life to delusion of energy, thinking that somehow I do not need to physically change myself and do something different in order to get the results I want to get… UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER. The Time is Here to get the results I intend, which is creating a world that is best for all Life, that is the ONLY character and way of being that I accept and allow. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the practical gifts of playing baseball, where I now see that the discipline of being part of a team, practicing, showing up at games whether I feel like it or not was a massive support for me now as I understand that DOING WHAT IS BEST and sticking to commitments is the only thing that matters, my feelings are irrelevant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be so clouded by emotion and the living of the character that I have failed to see that it is possible to immediately breathe and be Here and be aware of what is best in each moment AND direct myself in the moment, ALL the time, this IS possible, it just takes a process as the 7 year journey to Life where I am rewriting my characters to be ONLY the character of what is best for all Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my Self-Esteem and Self-Worth is Life and what is best for all Life that we are walking into existence, observing more and more, taking more and more responsibility, so each and every day walking process is what counts, and THIS is Who I am, I accept nothing more and nothing less

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt my self-trust and degrade my self-trust, through participating in energy/characters that I have not even yet put words to, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am peeling back layers of characters which WILL take time and physical living application, so the best focus of me and Who I AM, is on taking FULL responsibility of what is HERE, doing it perfectly, perfecting each point, THEN the next layers will emerge and I will be ready for them, as WHO I AM is Perfection in each and every moment, improving each and every day, until what is best for all Life is evident and ensured, breath by breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for judging myself for years, and harboring this judgment toward myself, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I forgive myself for accepting and allowing who I am to be compromised as less than Life, failing to see Self-Forgiveness is the Solution, until Here no Further, as I peel back each layer through Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application, dissipating each energetic charge and character/personality, rewriting Self, as each moment I learn and PROVE that I TRUST myself, and that as I continually walk this process, Who I AM as LIFE as the ONE character of What is Best for All Life is Here and Living as Self, equal to and one with all Life, patiently progressing, perfecting process, moment by moment breath by breath. Beyond self-judgment, just presence, Here, Living Self-Forgiveness and Self-Correction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that through this writing I went to Best For All Life Character from Shy Timid Loser, as I now see that NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS I will persist and I will succeed as Anti-Fragile is a Living Word Within me that I openly welcome the best tests to thus prove to myself in complete integrity that I am antifragile and my character IS living as what is best for all Life. I know peeling back and reintegrating each character will be a journey, and I am Living this Journey and it WILL be done. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that my commitment statements are part of WHO I AM, and therefore How I Show Up with others is in TRUST, where what is best WILL emerge and this will just take time and patience and be wonderful practice of breathing, being here and GIVING of WHO I AM FULLY. I am teachable. I am willing to learn, willing to change, willing to prove myself and do whatever it takes to create a world that is best for all Life. 

Therefore

When and as I notice myself participating in shyness, timidity and/or the energy of ‘loser’ I stop and I breathe

I realize that losing is winning provided I am Here in awareness to learn the lesson and thus Live the Correction, even if it takes time, I am committed as this is WHO I AM

I realize that shyness and timidity is abdication of responsibility, which is unacceptable

I realize that Real Living is Giving of myself unconditionally

I realize that Who I Am is Life

I realize that from every failure and loss there are gifts that I am aware of, as I am more present every day as I write/right myself to Life

I realize that my characters that I have accepted and allowed are actively being purified to ONLY remain as what is best for all Life

I realize that I am Self-Honestly Walking the 7 year journey to Life

I realize that I do not need to doubt this journey, rather just breathe and be Here

I realize that Self-Directiveness is imperative to doing what is best and Living the Change

I realize that I am changing myself fundamentally

I realize that baseball, striking out, stepping up to tell my parents I wanted to quit, was all part of my journey, but NOW I realize that REAL LIFE and the WORLD SYSTEM is the game that I am 100% focused on “winning”, that I am perfectly prepared always and in all ways through my Life until now, so that none of my baseball or ANY EVENTS I HAVE EVER BEEN PART OF have ever been in vain, because I am HERE, CLEAR and Breathing, Giving, Living. We are the dream team. We are Team Life. We will WIN and create the world so that it IS best for all Life

Therefore

I commit myself to show myself that I am antifragile

I commit myself to creating the world to be best for all Life, by FIRST creating my self and purifying myself to be that which is best for all Life, which looks like actively walking my process every day, showing up, following the schedule, GIVING to my communities, and Breathing/Living Self-Forgiveness and Self-Correction moment by moment breath by breath

I commit myself to openly taking more and more responsibility through who I am, how I interact, the day to day living and building of my organizations and projects, where I support others to walk their journey to Life through using TT and plugging in to the systems

I commit myself to participate with the best thoughts of upcoming events and situations, realizing that each and every event, new connection, new opportunity is ALL best, because who I AM is Life, antifragile, aware and Here

I commit myself to show myself that I can continually have the best day ever even if there are things ‘hanging over my head’ or commitments that I’ve made that will take time to come to fruition, because WHO I AM is what counts, THAT is the real accumulation, the breath by breath accumulation of the responsibility/observation where always and in all ways I do what is best for all Life

I commit myself to realize that Giving is Living and this is Who I AM as Life - Giving Unconditionally, intentionally and wisely

I commit myself to realize that in every moment I can breathe and be aware of what is going on, if there are characters running in my mind, and I can LIVE and Direct Myself in each moment, no character manifestations needed, ONLY the character of what is best for all Life

I commit myself to live as the character of what is best for all Life, removing anything else

I commit myself to show myself that discipline is best

I commit myself to understand breath by breath accumulation of responsibility where always and in all ways I am directing myself as Life for what is best for all Life

I commit myself to prove to myself that feelings are irrelevant, the discipline is what truly counts

I commit myself to consistent daily writing in Self-Honesty

Day 45 - Inadequacy

I notice that when I go through the sales process, if someone does NOT commit to buy, I feel inadequate.

I feel like s*** and I feel rejected, PLUS I feel like I wasted my time and their time. 

I hate this feeling.

I hate knowing that I know better, but not having that resonate through myself on an unconscious, subconscious and conscious level - completely in integrity. I KNOW what I sell works, I KNOW it is able to drastically improve people's lives and get results.. I think that is why it sucks so much, is that when I ‘fail’ at getting another to see the benefit of the product, that I have let them down because I wasn’t ‘adequate’ (sufficient/competent) enough to show explicitly how what I offer can and will solve their problems.

I also feel pissed that I avoid the tough conversations and ‘rising to the occasion’. I hate feeling like this, where I am inadequate and unable to succeed, even though I have different times in my life where I have proven that I can succeed, it’s like it’s ‘not enough’ to work through this block and horrible feeling I have within me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am unacceptable and unallowable as a human, that I am a failure fundamentally as who I am as I have been inadequate in what I do, failing to see that I am Life but because of failures in my approach when building my business/selling, I thus perceive myself and accept myself as just an inadequate failure, ROBBING myself the opportunity to learn/grow/evolve from the failure

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself to be able to learn from the failure, when in reality, I will prove if I am learning based in my consistent daily application of showing up again and again, within Self-Honesty and Self-Awareness, even a little bit more each time, to thus verify if I am indeed learning and improving, or if I am ACTUALLY deluding myself into true inadequacy, which would be the acceptance of the ‘defeat’ as “that’s all there is”.... No. This Writing Here is my Proof that I am developing Self-Trust, Self-Honesty and Self-Awareness, AND I realize that anything worthwhile takes time to build, day in and day out. Thus it is on ME to prove myself, and the adequacy that I am creating for myself is whether I am showing up as LIFE day after day, where even if I fall, I have the opportunity to stand up again and move forward with Self-Honesty and Living my Principles. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have failed/refused to realize that I fear the responsibility of stepping up and selling/influencing another even after it appears their ‘mind is made up’, when in reality, I am able to ask questions and support the other to really remember WHY they are Here, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have refused to see that I must in my self-honesty do what I can to support the other as Living my Principle of Giving as I want to Receive, so THIS is the focus, GIVING, and stepping up to give always and in all ways within common sense and the Principles of what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have failed to see that this waiting around for the ‘decision’ from another to whether they will buy/move forward or not, that this ‘waiting’ is practice for my UNBENDING SELF-TRUST to grow, like putting in reps at the gym putting my muscles under tension, where within this waiting I am able to work through any backchat, fears, limitations, doubts, concerns, irritations, agitations, mind-consciousness system energetic reactions…. As each and every single point must be worked through to completion as I am walking my journey to life, so the ‘time period’ where these point surface is a golden opportunity to write/right them out so as to not time loop, rather actually ‘move up’ in Living my Principles in complete integrity 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the backchat conversations within myself and the allowance of the backchat to persist, failing to see/realize/understand that Effective Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application will trap and eradicate the backchat so it never need exist again within me, thus WHO I AM is able to be HERE as LIFE resonating 100% integrity through anything and everything I do

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel superior to others and use backchat to validate my ego/energy believing that I am a king and I am better/more adequate than the other because they don’t see reality like I do, when in REAL REALITY it is MY responsibility to communicate with the other, through anything - conflict, uncertainty, fear, any and every emotional reaction - as it is just energy, to thus SUPPORT the other to see reality as I see it, and to also remain open myself to see reality as THEY see it, where we can come into agreement as to what is best for all Life, even if it takes time, energy, attention, resources. THIS is the Living of the Principles that I am committed to. This is REAL Adequacy, adequate/sufficient LIVING of the Principles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the origin point within my backchat of feeling inadequate, then conversing with myself in my mind and secret mind how I am actually adequate, WITHOUT have anything to do with real reality and actually changing myself in the real physical world to actually being adequate (defined as having the requisite qualities or resources to meet a task/sufficient for a purpose). Time to adequately resolve the origin of my reaction to inadequacy once and for all, and redefine it to what is best for all Life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that my current understanding of inadequacy has been inadequate in itself for establishing myself and my words in oneness and equality, where this origin/starting point of the word was ego/energy, so of course the backchat will be coming from the ego/energy, until Here no Further

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to redefine inadequacy as the accurate assessment of where I am not effective at achieving a goal, and thus a gift for reflection and self-perfection, to apply the tools of breath, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, as those tools, when applied within Principles, are adequate for complete resolution and restoration of integrity within myself and with all of Life. It just takes time and patience.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that my emotional reaction to inadequacy is based in an original memory from childhood of the first time I failed at a goal and thus the energy/emotional reaction compounded from there

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to to have failed to realize that when I was a child I went to my friend’s house and we were playing a video game and he kept beating me in the game over and over and I reacted emotionally and started crying and wanted to leave, thus solidifying the resonant experience within me of establishing a goal (winning the video game), failing at the goal, then NOT stopping and breathing and learning from the failure, rather getting reactive and then crying and then feeling embarrassed and annoyed and just giving up, NEVER BRINGING the SITUATION to COMPLETION, UNTIL HERE… the emotion need not go FURTHER

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see/realize/understand the GIFT of my inadequate participation in playing the video game, where I got dominated in the game and lost, where this was a golden opportunity for me to stop and breathe and re-clarify the goal, to thus establish self-honesty and self-trust and self-corrective application in the moment and then over time, thus preventing any further emotion like embarrassment/annoyance/acceptance of defeat, so within this I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to sentence myself as an inadequate loser, failing to see that it was just a temporary defeat and a learning opportunity, yet it was ME who admitted the permanent defeat with my OWN sentencing and my own abdication of responsibility to even determine if the game was worthy of my participation or if it was just an energy-distraction from what REALLY matters, which is real physical reality, relationships and supporting a world that is best for all Life, where the game COULD have been best, if I applied my principles and had a clear starting point within the game, and thus the aftermath of the game and WHO I AM within the game and the reflection on the game/learning from the game, as I now see that I can learn from ANYTHING, failure and success to any varying degree

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to realize that failure in the process of achieving a worthy goal is sometimes the best thing ever because the failure can teach me IF I AM WILLING to Learn… therefore THIS is my real teachability index.. Am I willing to accept change, to be humble enough, to learn, and to adjust my approach where I go through any emotional reaction/response, I breathe, I assess the situation, I DIRECT MYSELF and then in the aftermath I direct myself to learn and thus apply any more self-forgiveness and self-corrective application until I have verifiable and true evidence that I actually do change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have feared and thus unconsciously, subconsciously and consciously avoided situations where I will risk losing at achieving a goal out of not wanting to experience the emotional reaction I had deemed as ‘inadequacy’, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that putting myself in situations where I am inadequate (not able to meet the goal at the current point in time) is a MAJOR gift as I now stand in principles so thus I will LEARN rapidly through any failure, because WHO I AM will persist even through a failure, plus it will be further confirmation of WHO I AM and my standing as Life and Principles, through any failure, any hardship, any emotional reaction, I will prove myself to stand for and as Principles, and THAT is the real adequacy… do I stand or do I abdicate responsibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the lie that inadequacy and feeling the emotions/avoiding the emotions is more important and beneficial than standing for and as Principles, within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to rewire my entire neurochemistry to support myself with feeling the fear and enjoying the fear/the test, the hardship, the difficulty, the rejection, the attacks, the conversations, the cutting edge…. Until Here no Further, through rescripting myself and rewriting myself day by day, Living the change through thought, word and deed, I AM living proof that I am walking the cutting edge and directing all of humanity to what is best for all Life, day after day, breath by breath

Therefore

When and as I notice myself reacting to the cutting edge and being exposed to my real adequacy or inadequacy, I stop and I breathe

I realize that the cutting edge is where I prove in truth Who I AM and what I stand for and as

I realize that throwing myself in the cutting edge of time, where I am faced with all fears/weaknesses/limitations is BECOMING a place where I LOVE to be, where it is BEST as it is where I face my real Self and Express my Real Self

I realize that my agreement with myself is all the strength I need, as I stand and walk breath by breath, developing the antifragility and standing as a Living Example of what is best for all, with the support of others and we all move forward in our agreement(s)

I realize that inadequacy is a gift because in my self-honesty and self-trust, I now see exactly where I am falling short, and I have the tools and the support to actually work through this inadequacy, where I then become adequate (able to fulfill the purpose)

I realize that it is essential to understand the rules of “what I am going for” to determine within Self-Honesty if the goal I am attempting to get (and thus be either adequate or inadequate) is worthy of my Life and effort

I realize that understanding of these rules of “what I am going for” is the starting point, and is worthy of reflection, consideration and purification, so the ONLY rules/effort/focus is on creating a world that is best for all Life, as anything less than that is an abomination of the Life I was given

I realize that in creating a world that is best for all Life, we are going to be inadequate for some time, yet the inadequacy is gifting us clear indicators of where to improve, provided we walk this process and use the tools every day and Live the Principles every day…

Therefore

I commit myself to the starting point of EVERYTHING in my Life going toward what is best for all Life, where any inadequacy is now a gift that I receive and I openly welcome

I commit myself to integrate these points of ‘inadequacy’ to learn, process and evolve through my accumulation of my choices, my decisions, my attention and my efforts, so that always and in all ways I ACTUALLY do what is best, not just in theory, but in real cutting-edge practical Living

I commit myself to strengthen and support myself through embodying my Principles that I stand for and as, through the rewiring of myself through daily consistent application where I am a Self-Perfection Super Computer, the input is the feedback from my environment which includes both ‘successes’ and ‘failures’ and the output of my Super Computer is my Visible Living of the Principles, more and more and more until the point is hit where always and in all ways I stand for and Live as what is best for all Life

I commit myself to walk the cutting edge of time through all that I do, facing ANY conversation, any meeting, any event, any introspection, any and every possible scenario that can manifest, so I PROVE that  I AM LIVING MY PRINCIPLES from HERE FORWARD, therefore I AM adequate in who I stand as, and building from this base-line platform of adequacy (my starting point of oneness, equality, principles for and as what is best for all Life) thus I boldly move forward and walk the cutting edge of universal existence as Life is on my side, as I am Life, directing EVERYTHING to what is best for all Life, where thus any future inadequacy is a blessing and a gift that I am committed to thoroughly integrating within my Self-Honesty and Self-Trust ANY lessons and experiences of ‘inadequacy’, so I can thus support myself and all others to always and in all ways do what is best for all Life and we can then Live as REAL-LIFE-ADEQUACY (being able to meet needs/be sufficient in achievement) where the World is What is Best for All Life, always and in all ways

Day 44 - The Real Money Authority

I have noticed reactions within both losing money and making money.

This shows me the obvious common sense that Who I Am is being influenced by money, so I am abdicating my responsibility and authority from being Life, to just energy-authority whipping me around like a sailboat in an ocean completely dependent on something outside myself. Until Here No Further. I am the directive principle.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate WHO I AM as Life Authority for the desire/experience of money, where I give money power over me, over how I feel, how I interact, how I think and Who I believe that I AM, where this is CLEARLY me giving away my authority to Money, UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER. This is a process of purifying money and Who I AM as Money from the most fundamental level.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the unconscious behaviors, the subconscious characters and backchat, and the conscious thoughts/feelings/emotions of thinking I am a victim and thinking I am lucky to exist within me, where who I am with money is either a victim, or is lucky, failing to see/realize/understand that what is best is the understanding that the Money is a tool and is an extension of me as Who I am, in and as the starting point of what is best for all Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have refused to direct money and take absolute 100% responsibility of Who I AM and my money I have, the systems I have to create more money, and my level of responsibility in the world system of money 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need to have a secure job and paycheck in order for me to be secure in Who I AM, which is a lie. The security in Self comes first, and I prove this as I give unconditionally, within common sense and principles. The money WILL come more and more over time and I will prove this, that Who I AM as LIFE comes first. This is the starting point of the World that is Best for All Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have refused to prove to myself that I can handle making more money AND Living Here as Life, as Life is the real starting point, the money is just an extension of me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see/realize/understand that Who I AM is Life, and through walking this process of Self-Perfection within Principles, that I can and will stand as Life where thus Money is just an extension of me and it is equal to and one with me as Life, where through me and my daily participation, directing myself in equality and oneness as Life, from the starting point of Principles, that money is then just a tool and an extension of me. I AM Life. I AM the authority. Money is a tool by which we support the entire World-System to be Life-giving.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the gift within poverty and suffering/not knowing where my paycheck/money is coming from, where now I realize that tracking my spending, tracking my income, tracking my finances CONSISTENTLY is the answer, as this habit of checking and reporting these numbers allows me to understand where I am really at within the world system, so Who I AM as Life, and my starting point is what is best for all Life, that I now equalize myself with my money, where no more do I need to accept and allow the money-consciousness running rampant hijacking the mind/my body like a parasite alien taking over who I am. NO MORE. I am the directive principle. I will prove this time and time again no matter how much money is in my bank account.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the more money I have coming in was an indicator that I was still compromising who I AM, as the new influx of money was coinciding with me being happier, more carefree, which is not best, as that is OBVIOUSLY me being controlled by money, until I have now DEVELOPED Who I AM within money, which is established through my budgeting, my consistent tracking of my funds and my finances, where no matter if I make money or lose money, I am committed to budgeting, so this HERE is the gift of making more money and then losing money, and going through the ‘ups and the down’ is that I see WHERE I still have to purify myself in relationship with money, so then I am the ultimate power and the money has no power ‘over’ me. This will be proven through my process of writing and correcting myself unconsciously, subconsciously and consciously, so that always and in all ways I do what is best for all Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself the believe that it is acceptable to rush my process and my accumulation of responsibility. No. Step by step. The ‘slow way’ is the ‘short way’. Slowly AND surely this will get done.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I can get rich quick, when in reality it is WHO I AM in the consistent daily application that matters, and as I develop myself, steady, constantly, consistently over time, through my tracking of my finances and my living of my principles, I trust myself to continue building my businesses and feeding the businesses, where in turn the money will emerge. IT TAKES TIME and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the gift of patience, and the process of becoming the kind of person that CAN and DOES patiently build, day after day, week after week, month after month and so forth

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have not realized that I do in fact trust myself to show up consistently every day, and within this, my self-awareness is increasing, so I can and I will handle anything that comes up, even if it is emotionally tough, I have all the support I need, and the unbending trust in myself and my process is HERE, breath by breath in Self-Honesty.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize the most effective next steps to building my income and profit, thus my wealth, which is externally - marketing and giving value/supporting relationships, and internally, walking extensive and thorough self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within BRUTAL self-honesty, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that I AM the directive principle over the money, where it is WHO I AM in my daily consistent application that is what creates or does not create the profitable relationship with money, so consistent daily application and Living the Principles is what counts, and time will prove this as more money IS coming in

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the acceptances and allowances of unworthiness programming deep within my flesh, UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER as I AM worthy as Life and I will thus PROVE this. Life Authority Always and in All Ways. Money is a tool and the Life-Giving World-System is Here within and as me and us walking our process collectively in agreement with our principles. It is seeds growing over time.

Therefore…

When and as I notice myself reacting to money, I stop and I breathe

I realize that through breath and clarifying my starting point of what is best for all Life, that I can and will direct money as an extension of ME to what is best for all Life

I realize that consistent daily application of my Self-Forgiveness AND Self-Corrective Application process is moving myself forward as it is WHO I AM within and as Money that counts, so this is really Living the Change, the money will keep coming as I accumulate more responsibility

I realize the Equal Money System is emerging within me as I walk my process in brutal Self-Honesty and Living my Principles, it just takes time to emerge

I realize that there is a danger of making more money too soon without fundamentally changing Who I AM and clarifying/living my starting point of and as what is best for all Life, where the money acts as a sedative/drug where I risk becoming numb to the problems of the world (which is really just me), UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER as I realize that Who I AM with money will be tested in all ways, including making tons of money, where in my wisdom and the support from our group I will be STEADY, and WE WILL BE STEADY, HERE as LIFE through BREATH and our relationship Agreements.

I realize that breath accumulation is equal to the money/wealth accumulation.

I realize that the breath accumulation of Who I AM as Life will equal the money accumulation, where through the negative and positive experiences with money, who I am will shine through as Life beaming through always and in all ways, and ANY reaction that comes up I have the tools of Self-Forgiveness and Breath and Self-Corrective Application which I TRUST myself to implement, always and in all ways

I realize that unless my starting point is what is best for all Life, anything I do will accumulate consequences for which I am responsible, therefore I commit myself to CONTINUALLY and ALWAYS re-establish my Starting Point to be what is Best for All Life until this is certain and unbending and verifiable always and in all ways

I realize that exposing my secret mind of money IS absolutely best, as it allows me to purify myself and my Living Flesh to thus direct Life in actuality to what is best

Therefore….

I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application accumulate responsibility, breath, wealth as WHO I AM is LIFE and the money/energy will grow as a tool that I use as an extension of me as Life, yet Life is the starting point and I will solidify and substantiate this starting point as I LIVE this starting point, moment by moment breath by breath

I commit myself to track my bank account balances, my monthly spending, my income, my expenses and my net worth every month with consistency, as this is the proof of me accumulating responsibility, awareness, Life, Breath and Money

I commit myself to always dig in and find the lesson with any negative money experience, through breath, self-forgiveness and consistent application where who I am will be proven time and time again that I stand as Life and Principles

I commit myself to dig in and find the lesson with any positive money experience, through breath, self-forgiveness and consistent application, where who I am will be proven time and time again that I stand as Life and Principles

I commit myself to prove to myself I can handle making more money, Living within and as my Principles, directing everything and anything to what is best for all Life