Day 12 - Too Much For Me? No. Just Add Self-Honesty.

Sometimes I wonder if I do too much. 

Sometimes I wonder I am not doing enough.

I am clearly not clear if I am doing too much or too little because I don't even know the answer in my Self-Honesty.

Perhaps this is just my mind/ego thinking that there is a way to 'know' if you are doing too much.

By doing too much, I specifically mean, the amount of actions and activity I do every day to accomplish my goals and keep walking my process, I have many things I want to do, at least 10 things every day. 

Some days I complete all 10 and I feel good, like I am worthy of a reward (outside of just the reward of knowing I am living in integrity) because I accomplished my goals, I even feel superior because I know I am more productive than others (but then I also feel inferior because I know others are 'doing more' than me).

Other days I get overwhelmed and there is emotion that says 'Just stop' and do not move on. Just take a break. Sometimes I listen to that voice sometimes I don't.

THIS is the real issue. 

The issue is that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to really understand and LIVE as the Self-Directive Principle, and man I have beat myself up about this...

I have accepted and allowed myself to have refused to see my Life with Self-Honesty and what I do on a daily basis, overcomplicating it.... until now...

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see what Self-Honesty looks like in my day-to-day application of walking process and accomplishing my goals

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to operate from emotion and the energy of wanting to do more or less, not realizing that operating from that energy will fluctuate, and this is not the best way to organize my life and operate.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have compared myself with others in my daily output, feeling superior to others, inferior to others, not realizing the simplicity of Life that we all have our role to play in creating Heaven on Earth, so the only 'comparison' that is worthy of making, is me in my Self-Honesty looking at what I am doing to what I realistically can do, in the most sustainable and optimal way, as this is a Life-Long Journey.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be arbitrary in what it means to 'win' and have a successful and productive day, and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be arbitrary and not clearly define what is the 'sweet spot' versus 'too much' versus 'not enough' with how much I decide to 'do' and focus on 'completing' during any given day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to clearly have established my starting point of Life and my Chief Aim, to the point where this is the only focus I have when I work, where I am close, but have not yet established it perfectly

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to have supported myself in establishing and creating my to-do list and my inner operating system on a conscious, subconscious and unconscious level in a way that is supportive of myself always and in all ways, and equally supportive of all Life, always and in all ways

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have this never-ending to-do list that is unclear in specifically what is required that will support myself and Life to creating a world that is best, and in this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to have the discernment, wisdom, authority and Self-Directiveness to confidently remove and eliminate everything that is not required and just a waste of time and energy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have refused to see that really my to-do list has had the starting point of me wanting to get more money to secure my survival, and to satisfy my need for sex, because if I am productive and can make money, I will be able to provide for my future family, wife, kids thus guaranteeing safety, security, sex, and the other basics of Life for my self alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have supported myself to realize that my to-do list can in fact be supportive of what is best for all Life and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see (until now) that my starting point CAN ACTUALLY BE LIFE and what is best for all Life, just realizing that it is a process that I walk daily with writing, using TT and connecting with and supporting others

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to look at my to-do list with fresh eyes, from the Self-Directive Principle that guides me to doing what is actually best in alignment with my goals

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel dread and overwhelm (and like it is too much) with and AS my to-do list (as my to-do list is really an extension of me, but it has accumulated self-dishonesty within it, thus I have the experiences of uncertainty, lacking clarity and feelings like dread) instead of just writing in out, so here we go...

When and as I notice the thoughts/feelings/emotions/backchat and overall 'energy' of 'too much' in my conscious mind thoughts, in my subconscious mind characters, and in my unconscious mind behavioral patterns, I stop and I breathe

I realize that breath is the stabilizing force that will support me as I re-write and refine and purify my 'to-do' list and my Life

I realize that through this self-corrective application that is happening here and now, I AM in fact purifying my to-do list, my inner operating system (consciously, subconsciously and unconsciously).

I realize I am purifying my starting point and WHO I AM in my location point within this world-system and Life, and I am actually moving myself to creating a world that is best for all Life as I am purifying my mind-consciousness system within (through self-forgiveness of this 'too much' conflict that is occurring consciously, subconsciously and unconsciously)

I realize that this writing itself is supportive of all Life, and I know this in my Self-Honesty because I notice the discharging of energy and the stabilization that comes from these statements, the writing, the Self-Trust building through my Self-Honesty in this Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application

I realize that I will in fact prove to myself that this Self-Corrective Application works

I realize that that feeling of proving to myself that this Self-Corrective Application works is a very good 'positive' feeling, so I realize that this is worthy of future investigation, yet I trust myself that I will write this out in the days to come, in my newly purified and established to-do list that is a result of me writing this Self-Forgiveness and actually applying myself and my Self-Correction through Self-Honesty and Self-Awareness throughout my day today and all days forth

I realize that my Self-Directive Principle is in fact developing and this is supportive to my Self-Trust and Self-Honesty

I realize that whenever I am in doubt or in trouble and feeling overwhelmed, I always have the tools of breath and Self-Forgiveness, and the power of the group within TechnoTutor users and the Self-Perfected group that I can reach out to for support

I realize that I have the support of others walking process so we can keep each other in check and ask for support so we can really leverage the mastermind and group dynamics as we walk this journey to Life, as Life, for Life

I realize that my to-do list can in fact be my best friend and IT IS OKAY if there is tons of information on there, because I trust myself to use my calendar, my daily check list and my Self-Honesty to guide me through and live my Destiny

I realize that clarifying my Chief Aim has been CRITICAL to me even being able to process what an effective to-do list is, because it serves as a filter for what is actually best and what is not best

I realize that Self-Honesty is an asset for Life

I realize it is counterintuitive (currently seems counterintuitive to me), that by me using time to write out my mind and write self-forgiveness, that this actually allows me to make progress in my real journey in Life that actually matters, that actually leads to me expanding my network, supporting others to walk their process and establish the basic needs required, food, water, clothing, housing, education, living income and community

I realize that Life is actually simple, the mind is complicated

I commit myself to show myself and prove to myself that Life is in fact simple, that I am here to support myself in walking process, distributing and supporting others with TT, and I am here to support all Life to establish their basic human needs to be guaranteed, food, water, clothing, housing, education, living income and community

I commit myself to show myself that it is easy to connect with the right people that are working on bringing Heaven to Earth (meaning that all humans have their needs met)

I commit myself to show others that Life is in fact simple

I commit myself to cross-pollinate my network even more effectively and with Self-Honesty and with Self-Trust so that we can expedite this process of alleviating suffering in the world and actually ensuring Heaven on Earth

I commit myself to support my TechnoTutor network so we can get this elite level of education to all, and build our collective vocabulary so we can articulate and create Heaven on Earth for All

I commit myself to refine my to-do list so it is all supportive of my Self-Honesty and my Self-Directive Principle to doing what is best always and in all ways

I commit myself to breathe when and as I work, from phone calls to laptop work to writing to taking a break, to listening to content, to anything I do in my daily activities, knowing that my breath will stabilize me and others 

I commit myself to know that in my Self-Honesty, I am not doing too much, provided that every day I keep focused on the basics - Writing, TT, and connecting with others/supporting others to establish and confirm and guarantee their needs are met

This is good, this will be a process, this is what Life is about, now I have Self-Honesty and trust in my process of writing, TT and connecting with others. 

It is that simple, this is Life, and Life is Here.