(This blog is written in the context of Self-Forgiveness - so as you read through, Read the Self-Forgiveness/Self-Realization and Self-Commitment statements of this post out loud)
I am really reflecting on this concept of Will - and my own Will Power and what I Will do with my Life - especially as of recently, as I am now seeing directly Who I AM and the positions of responsibility that I have taken on - and these decisions/acceptances/Will that continually accumulate, each and every day as my decisions are now clearly affecting more and more people
Especially now living in Minneapolis and noticing the riots happening in response to George Floyd being murdered by a police officer, I literally see the city burning in front of me out of my window.
I see my actions or inaction directly influencing the community as I run a meetup and we gather once a week and discuss how to support ourselves and our community through education, finances and creating real systematic change. Both inner change and taking real responsibility to create systemic change within the community and then globally.
There are still old patterns I notice come up, where it is “easy” to just blame something else but that is not what is best. Any blame and excuse and justification is not acceptable. What is my responsibility in this?
I notice that the pull/pattern to ‘blame’ others is less than I have ever had it. Thanks to the extensive use I’ve done of 2+ hours a day of TechnoTutor, consistently writing and working through DIP Pro, with the extensive support of my buddies and network. I can tell I am changing internally as it is reflected externally through the level of conversations, who I am speaking with, the growth of my businesses and the amount of people consistently attending our meetups.
Now I look ahead and see that in the aftermath of the riots, whenever they are over, WILL be the process of rebuilding but THIS TIME from the starting point of what is really best, what is REAL support for the community, what can we REALLY do, how can we REALLY ensure that Police are held accountable in the legal system, how can we ensure that Police and Citizens have the ability to express themselves, to understand each other, to coexist in a Civil Society where nobody need operate from fear, but rather through Principles - like what is best for ALL.
This is a real journey, a real test of my character and my Will.
This starts within me.
Within my will.
My moment by moment accumulation of responsibility or my abdication of responsibility.
What WILL I choose?
What WILL we choose?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in behaviors, acceptances and allowances that have degraded my willpower and twisted my willpower so that my will had been NOT aligned with what is actually best for all Life. Until Here no further.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself within and as my reaction to my mind’s projection of the future, to react in fear, that if I continue to WILL myself to stand up and support other community members, that I WILL end up in public leadership positions and thus be a target for attack because I am willing to stand for what is best for all Life looking for others who are willing to Stand as Life as well
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear “losing myself” to a greater purpose, when in reality, this is clearly what is best, and I trust that in this WILLING of myself, I will actually for the first time in my Life truly FIND myself - this time AS LIFE, the greater collective, embodied as me as an Absolute Individual, in the Perfected Form of Ego, not living in self-interest, rather Living and Directing Self within the context of what is best for each and every individual, and for us together as a collective
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to delude myself into thinking that writing out my blogs daily and practicing Self-Forgiveness is just this neat process that will take place in isolation and I do not need to actually face the complete extent of my fears, as I now see that absolutely that as I change my inside, I will be tested by the external world to see if I am serious in my change and if I WILL actually stand in my change, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to realize the gift that is these moments of realizing where I can take more responsibility and TAKING IT, even if I do not have the perfect plan or thought process in place, I know that I know enough and I have enough connections and support around me to figure it out, because I know that what we are doing with Self-Perfected, the Meetups, TechnoTutor and the other business ventures is ALL coming from the starting point of truly empowering real education and real effective resource distribution in the communities, and the continual WILLING of myself through my daily application within work, building the businesses and running the meetups within the systematic approach of creating communication and clear direction forward - these are all clear next steps to empower and build our communities in a way that is supportive of all Life, and this will be the test of my character and my WILL that I welcome fully
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear FULL commitment, that I somehow <100% commitment will cut it, when in reality that is an excuse, and that is the abdication of responsibility, anything less than 100% is 0.. And I understand this within common sense, that is a consistent process over time, where I build to 100% and I am tested on 100% over and over and over UNTIL I am verifiably 100% standing as Life, which I am prepared to do over time. Real WILL Power is becoming fully understood through what I do daily, moment by moment, within Self-Awareness and Principle.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look to others to see what they are doing from the starting point of wanting to see what others do and to respond based in what they’re doing, failing to see that that habit is an abdication of self-responsibility and self-directive will, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to take 100% responsibility for my decision-making and to thus direct myself within and as Principle to what is best, REGARDLESS of what others are doing, then of course within common sense, realizing that we are interconnected and interdependent, to then investigate and connect with others to determine what is best, but it FIRST comes from that Self-Responsibility and Self-Directive Will, where this time and moving forward I walk in Self-Trust, rather than dependency on others to do the reasoning or the work for me… it is on ME and my operation from my Principles
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear taking on responsibility and losing my Life/dying because of it, when in reality by me NOT taking on responsibility and doing what is best for all Life would be the real death, a slow death of regret and withering away to non-existence and complete irrelevance, completely failing to give Life as I was given Life, in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the common sense that I was freely given Life, thus within the Principle of Giving as I want to Receive, that I now dedicate myself to Giving Life to others, to thus support the cycle of Life that is For Giving, where we can now open up new possibilities within humanity/Life/what is Here
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to talk myself out of doing something because I feared it, when in reality looking at the common sense and my Principles, I knew it was better to actually do the action, so within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed weakness within myself, and the acceptance and allowance of the degradation of my Will Power, until Here no Further
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not realized the power of Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application in the reconditioning of my Will to establish my Will and the Will of our Community to what is best for all Life, first within and as the System, and then the re-willing of the System to a Life-Giving System supportive of all Life
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not practically investigate the next steps for reconditioning my Will through my Living Expression and Standing as a Living Example of what is best, by speaking out on social media, connecting with others in the community and truly building on solid foundation first within myself and then supporting others to do the same
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not fully trust myself and my word, when I have made a decision and “willed” myself to make the decision, but not had the integrity to follow up in all ways to back that decision with the Will of consistent and disciplined action, until Now as I am proving to myself and to all that I can and will continually walk my process, sharing my journey and working on real practical solutions to support the basic needs being covered in the city, so we can document and replicate this model city-by-city around the world, all starting with the 1+1 relationships that I have with others Here
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the distractions and the hard-wiring of distraction and avoidance to exist within me and to exist in the “external” world-system, where we collectively accept and allow our Will to be degraded and by-passed and manipulated by the system which WE have accepted and allowed and co-created, Until HERE no Further, this New System that is Life-Giving starts within me, and is Lived through my daily application of Principles as I WILL this Life-Giving System into existence
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the common sense that the best way forward and the ONLY way forward that is worthy of our individual and our collective will is the creation of a world that is best for all Life, where we have equal opportunity, equal education, equal resource distribution and the basic human needs covered, as a BASIS so we can collectively go up to the ‘next level’ and really start Living, not just suffering/paying bills/getting by until we die. And no this is not communism, this is just basic common sense resource distribution, leveraging what is possible with Technology to empower the equal opportunity to basic human needs being met, THEN individuals are allowed to grow on TOP of this basic foundation where all of Life is treated equally and valued as Life equally.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the abuse of myself and our world through the ignorance to how the mind really operates and functions, where our mind-energy-consuming-system is generating conflict and consuming this entire physical reality into a momentary experience of negative, neutral and positive emotion, completely failing to see that the world is burning up right in front of our eyes, and we can STILL DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, so that time is NOW…. WILL we?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be dishonest with myself about the activities and the actions I am doing/accepting/allowing that degrade my will power, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have feared the neurochemical pain of breaking these addictions, like youtube, sleeping in, f***ing around not making REAL things happen, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that I have been deluding myself the withdrawal is not worth the change in my WILL, so I just continued the dishonesty, UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the gift that is the withdrawal and the change and the breaking of the patterns, that even if it is uncomfortable and I feel sick and gross and like I want to ‘cave back in’ to the old habit, that I can always breathe and practice Self-Forgiveness, and this is the REAL walking of the Self-Corrective Application breath by breath until in my 100% Self-Honesty and Self-Trust I can say I am taking 100% FULL Self-Responsibility for Self and World, to direct myself and support us all to direct ourselves to what is best for all Life within and as practical Common Sense
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not fully trust myself and my word, when I have made a decision and “willed” myself to make the decision, but not had the integrity to follow up in all ways to back that decision with the Will of consistent and disciplined action, until Now as I am proving to myself and to all that I can and will continually walk my process, sharing my journey and working on real practical solutions to support the basic needs being covered in the city, so we can document and replicate this model city-by-city around the world, all starting with the 1+1 relationships that I have with others Here
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the distractions and the hard-wiring of distraction and avoidance to exist within me and to exist in the “external” world-system, where we collectively accept and allow our Will to be degraded and by-passed and manipulated by the system which WE have accepted and allowed and co-created, Until HERE no Further, this New System that is Life-Giving starts within me, and is Lived through my daily application of Principles as I WILL this Life-Giving System into existence
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the common sense that the best way forward and the ONLY way forward that is worthy of our individual and our collective will is the creation of a world that is best for all Life, where we have equal opportunity, equal education, equal resource distribution and the basic human needs covered, as a BASIS so we can collectively go up to the ‘next level’ and really start Living, not just suffering/paying bills/getting by until we die. And no this is not communism, this is just basic common sense resource distribution, leveraging what is possible with Technology to empower the equal opportunity to basic human needs being met, THEN individuals are allowed to grow on TOP of this basic foundation where all of Life is treated equally and valued as Life equally.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the abuse of myself and our world through the ignorance to how the mind really operates and functions, where our mind-energy-consuming-system is generating conflict and consuming this entire physical reality into a momentary experience of negative, neutral and positive emotion, completely failing to see that the world is burning up right in front of our eyes, and we can STILL DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, so that time is NOW…. WILL we?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be dishonest with myself about the activities and the actions I am doing/accepting/allowing that degrade my will power, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have feared the neurochemical pain of breaking these addictions, like youtube, sleeping in, f***ing around not making REAL things happen, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see that I have been deluding myself the withdrawal is not worth the change in my WILL, so I just continued the dishonesty, UNTIL HERE NO FURTHER
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see the gift that is the withdrawal and the change and the breaking of the patterns, that even if it is uncomfortable and I feel sick and gross and like I want to ‘cave back in’ to the old habit, that I can always breathe and practice Self-Forgiveness, and this is the REAL walking of the Self-Corrective Application breath by breath until in my 100% Self-Honesty and Self-Trust I can say I am taking 100% FULL Self-Responsibility for Self and World, to direct myself and support us all to direct ourselves to what is best for all Life within and as practical Common Sense
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am Here, breathing, alive, with Self-Awareness and the perfect recipe is HERE of the current situations and turmoil of the world to see JUST how F***ED this has gotten, so we can now take a real STAND for and as Life, what is best for ALL Life, and to bring about a world that is best for all, and THIS is actually the most fun, exhilarating, testing, difficult, worthy cause I could EVER devote myself to and dedicate myself to, which I am now. WILL we sort it out? You can be certain I WILL. But “I” is not enough, it’s time WE go from I to WE, where WE take a stand, and walk this process of Self-Perfection to World-Perfection.
When and as I notice myself using my will power to ANYTHING else that is NOT best, I stop and I breathe
I realize that I am smart enough to figure out what is actually best in a situation
I realize that the time is now to step up and act on behalf of the community and the world, or it WILL get worse
I realize that through the connections we have and through the support we have, we have all we need to take the next steps, so WILL we?
I realize that UNLESS we stand together, any change will not last, so a community is required
I realize that education and increasing our fundamental understanding of how systems work and how the human exist within the system is essential to changing the systemic issues we are seeing through the riots, COVID and the overall suffering in the world
I realize that I am capable of far far greater than I previously conceived
I realize that WE are capable of far far greater than WE previously conceived
I realize that writing my Self-Forgiveness and LIVING The Self-Corrective Application CAN and WILL prove that I can and will stand as a Living Example so that others may see what is actually best, and this will take time, and that Time is the true test of the Will, which I WILL prove and this will be documented publicly through my blog, through my facebook and other social media channels
I realize that the Youth Mentorship Programs in the City of Minneapolis are a next logical step, and there will be MUCH more built on these platforms I cannot yet see in May of 2020, but this WILL unfold
I realize that my WILL power will be one of my greatest assets, so I continue to invest in it and test it in more and more ways so that with 100% self-honesty and self-trust I WILL be able to stand as Life no matter what
Therefore…
When and as I notice myself using my will power to ANYTHING else that is NOT best, I stop and I breathe
I realize that I am smart enough to figure out what is actually best in a situation
I realize that the time is now to step up and act on behalf of the community and the world, or it WILL get worse
I realize that through the connections we have and through the support we have, we have all we need to take the next steps, so WILL we?
I realize that UNLESS we stand together, any change will not last, so a community is required
I realize that education and increasing our fundamental understanding of how systems work and how the human exist within the system is essential to changing the systemic issues we are seeing through the riots, COVID and the overall suffering in the world
I realize that I am capable of far far greater than I previously conceived
I realize that WE are capable of far far greater than WE previously conceived
I realize that writing my Self-Forgiveness and LIVING The Self-Corrective Application CAN and WILL prove that I can and will stand as a Living Example so that others may see what is actually best, and this will take time, and that Time is the true test of the Will, which I WILL prove and this will be documented publicly through my blog, through my facebook and other social media channels
I realize that the Youth Mentorship Programs in the City of Minneapolis are a next logical step, and there will be MUCH more built on these platforms I cannot yet see in May of 2020, but this WILL unfold
I realize that my WILL power will be one of my greatest assets, so I continue to invest in it and test it in more and more ways so that with 100% self-honesty and self-trust I WILL be able to stand as Life no matter what
Therefore…
I commit myself to breathe and continually direct myself to what is best, within and as the awareness that Will is a force that is within me that is based in intention, decision, acceptance, allowance, and is sculpted over time
I commit myself to the 7+ year journey to Life to walk it with efficiency and effectiveness, remembering that if I fall and participate in Self-Dishonesty, there is consequence, so I move forward practically, not worried/fearful/overthinking, just within common sense, remembering that breath, Self-Forgiveness, Self-Corrective application are all tools that will support me and our community to collectively sculpt our Will so that we stand as a Living Example for the World of what is possible
I commit myself to rise to whatever level of responsibility is required to establish a world that is best for all Life that is verifiable where all can see/realize/understand that THIS is really what LIFE is about
I commit myself to challenge my will power within and as Common Sense, so that I can stand as a Living Example with no fear or doubt existent within me that my ‘will power is not sufficient’ as I will prove it IS - and this will show through my practical Living and directing anything and everything to what is best
I commit myself to humility, to listening to what others need, to supporting others unconditionally within common sense, and to develop Self-Leaders within the community and around the entire world
No comments:
Post a Comment