Day 38 - Rushing

I realize i have been rushing in nearly every aspect of my life

I eat food fast. I rush through meetings. I take fast showers. I love to drink coffee and feel the rush of the endorphins and the  caffeine hit my system. I read fast, I even have rushed through TT and I now am consciously slowing down to write this out.

I realize that in MY REAL self honesty that rushing is NOT best because when I rush I am accumulating consequences. I am just participating in energy unaware of the practicality and common sense.

For example the other day I realize that I rushed a TT sale and the client was not ready, so now I have to do a ton of back tracking and supporting the client to get clear on why they are using TT, it’s like selling and re-selling again, which is cool but I could have just slowed down and asked a few more questions, and been PRESENT, to be HERE, and factor in EVERYTHING to then ACTUALLY do what is best.

I know rushing is not best, so I am going to write this out.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the pattern of rushing, unconsciously, subconsciously and consciously I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hardwire rushing and instant gratification into the very fabric of my body, through my neuropathways and my unconscious behavior patterns, until Here no Further, as through Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application I can and will prove to myself that I can just operate from Breath and Principle, and prove what True Effectiveness in Creating a World that is Best for All Life in fact actually looks like, where we need not rush, we just move forward consistently, steadily, within and as Stability within and as Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to calibrate myself with the standard clock-time, instead of calibrating myself to Life as Breath, Here from moment to moment within PRINCIPLES, where I am the Self-Directive Principle, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fill up my schedule and my days with activities that had come from the starting point of energy, where I did not even stop and breathe and look with practical common sense at what is possible and what is best for how I plan my days and thus conduct myself through my days from the starting point of breath and Living the Principles

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accumulate consequences from rushing, thinking I was making the right moves and being productive, when in reality I was producing consequences because I wasn’t actually stable, present, and thinking through methodically what is the REAL outcome I am going for in the near and long term future, I was just focused on the energy of the present of “feeling productive” completely failing to see the long term consequences

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have refused to accept and allow the gift of slowing down and delaying the ‘gratification’ of doing, where in the stillness and silence and intentional presence, my Real and Unlimited Self will express and build as this Self is Here in the moment, able to express as my best version of myself provided I am breathing and assessing ALL within the context of what is best for ALL, not as analysis paralysis, just within Self-Honest Self-Trust and the Principles of doing what is best for all Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not realized that rushing from the starting point of energy and instability will just create more energy and more instability, with NO guarantee that it gets me the real PHYSICAL result that I am intending, just a fleeting energetic experience... within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not trusted myself enough to have and to practice the discernment to really honestly look at my starting point within my activities and what I am doing, to see if I am just rushing due to energy, or if I am actually being effective and efficient, in ACTUALLY doing what is best, which I will ONLY figure out based on my ability to be HERE with the feedback I am getting from the environment, and factoring in this feedback into my Principles, especially my Self-Honesty, Self-Responsibility and Self-Trust

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to re-define the word rushing, from how I have used to define rushing - which is just energy-rush going for more energy, to NOW the REAL definition that is supportive of ME and of all Life, where Rushing = Self-Honest Efficiency and Effectiveness in Progress toward a Worthy Goal

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take the sufficient time to clarify what a worthy goal is, when I have had some clarity, and some lack of clarity, where now I am starting to really see what the worthy goals are with rebuilding education, finance, politics, parenting and community, all from the starting point of what is best LONG-TERM, so within this I forgive myself that I have accepted anda allowed myself to have failed to see that the rushing and the short-term fix of ‘instant gratification’ and neurochemicals of dopamine and adrenaline, are just old patterns within my mind-consciousness system that are being rewritten through my Self-Honest Self-Forgiveness, and the Change is Lived through my Daily Living the Change through Self-Corrective Application, which specifically looks like Slowing Down, honoring my agreements, walking my process extensively in the writing out of the details, the intentional crafting of my schedule and the moment by moment application of Breath and Living Words to thus create AS this best version of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I do not rush, that the project or activity will fall apart and will not get completed, thus I will be a failure and my self-worth and self-esteem will drop, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to equate my self-worth and self-esteem to my perceived productivity through rushing and being busy, with or without even accomplishing anything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place my self-worth in my accomplishments and what I do, instead of placing my self-worth as Life within the realization that I am Life and I am equal to all Life and I am one with all Life, therefore no specific accomplishments, or rushing toward the goal is necessary, when I realize and Live the fact that I am Life and I will continue to be Here as Life.. it however DOES matter that I actually apply the Principles and I do not just abdicate responsibility as Life for the energy-authority

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to realize that when I say that I am worthy as Life, that means that I am worthy as Life, and AS Life I come from the starting point of Life in and as the real understanding of equality and oneness AS Life, so if I am abdicating responsibility for actually doing what is best for all Life and supportive of all Life, then I have dropped myself ‘below’ Life as I am not actually participating Here equal and one with Life, and Radical Self-Honesty will be my guide in this dance of establishing my Self and my Self-Worth Here as Life in equality and oneness, until it is verifiable and true that I am doing what is best for all Life, so within this starting point as Life, I now understand that my worth is Here as I am Life and I will honor Life in all forms even if that Life is abusive and repressed, I will honor the Life by supporting it, as I know I have the tools and the capabilities to support that Life to see the abuse it is doing, and to support that Life to walk equal and one with us as Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see/realize/understand that Life has its pace, and the best pace is the breath, therefore I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed ANY rushing coming from any starting point that is not the breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the limited self-definition to exist within me as the false belief that I am unable to be present with my breath 24/7 in awareness of Who I am as Life, when in reality through Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective application over time, I can and will prove this to myself that I can exist as breath in every moment, to then observe and prove to myself and to others what is really possible with existing as breath, beyond the limits of energy and rushing, and thus transforming any energy/rushing/hurrying to just me as breath doing what is best always and in all ways

When and as I notice myself coming from energy I stop and I breathe

I realize that coming from the starting point of just energy will only create more desire for energy, like a drug addict chasing a high that will eventually crash, and will actually accumulate consequences that put me/us as Life even worse off because we will have to backtrack and correct the mistakes

I realize that through BREATHING and through PRINCIPLES I can actually move effectively and efficiently through reality to actually achieve major progress in creating a world that is best for everybody

I realize that I can always stop and breathe if I am rushing/hurrying

I realize that slowing down and being present will allow me to actually ‘speed up’ in the real completion of a goal, as I will learn through this process what it means to be truly productive and a true achiever of an intended goal

I realize that I will have to face and transform all of the consequences I have created from my past rushing from the faulty starting point of just energy and self-interest, and ALSO I realize that self-forgiveness and TT will support me to effectively and efficiently work through the consequences so then I can actually do what is best and come from the real starting point of LIFE, to then truly Honor Life in all forms through my ability to support and give unconditionally in ways that are actually best

I commit myself to Self-Honest Self-Reflection, to notice where I am still coming from the starting point of energy/self-interest/patterns of hurrying and the accumulating of consequences, to then also within my Self-Honest Self-Reflection to notice where I am actually now coming from the right starting point and being TRULY effective

I commit myself to stand as a living example of delayed gratification

I commit myself to stand as a living example of true effectiveness within my planning/activities/reflections and Who I AM

I commit myself to continually practice Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application and to share these benefits with others, as these tools are the most powerful tools I have found and they will support billions of people as we collectively walk this journey to Life, breath by breath, no “rushing/hurrying” needed just real effectiveness to do what is best developing more and more in each and every moment

I commit myself to LIVE the Real Re-Definition of Rushing - to be Self-Honest Effectiveness and Efficiency in progressing toward worthy goals

I commit myself to prove to myself that I can breathe and operate from awareness more and more until it becomes who I am, and I operate from this starting point of what is actually best for all Life